The Yes Effect

I’m writing this from inside a tent in the Serengeti. It’s already been 3 days without a shower, wifi or any contact with anyone outside this group I’m traveling with. It’s my first time camping- it’s my first time on safari- it’s the first time in about 8 years that I’m on a trip with a girl friend and not a significant other. I have been having a lot of firsts lately; Throwing caution to the wind and instead of having a list of things I want to do, I’m writing my list of things I’ve done.
How did I get here, is a question you might be asking yourself. Well, I don’t know if you’re asking it but I sure as hell am. How did I get here? I guess the real answer to that is in every choice I’ve made, large and small, over the last thirty years- that has somehow culminated in me lying in a tent in the Serengeti, single at 30, next to my other single female friend- trading war stories about relationships past, soul searching and finding peace in this great unknown.
We came here to disconnect from the physical and reconnect to the spiritual. I needed to get in touch with my soul and what’s deep in my heart at this new point in my life and I knew that meant needing to lose touch with my daily life and regular routine. So here I am. I’m not sure I could be any further from my daily routine- I just had to hide my sneakers from a baboon for Gods Sake.
They say that time heals all- and I like to think travel heals all too. Coming here I was close to feeling like my old self again..and then I asked – why would I want to feel like my old self? I don’t want old anything- and I guess that desire for newness is one of the many ways I got here.
After Matt left I decided I was going to become a “yes man” – yep, just like the movie. I felt I had said “no” to a lot of opportunities and passed on too many personal goals. So naturally, I decided that in order to make up for lost time, I ought to start saying yes. To everything. Immediately. I’m not much of a take things slow kind of girl- if I’m in, I’m all in. This was no exception.
This wasn’t a situation where I would arbitrarily say yes to any and all things- but rather say yes to things that struck a cord in me, things I wanted to do but hadn’t, things that excited me.
One of the first questions anyone asked me just hours after my Yes Man conversion – was “do you wanna go to Africa?” And here I am. I shit you not. Even though I’ve never really understood that expression. Yes. I do want to go to Africa… and here I am. In Africa, in a tent with a friggen hyena outside, talking to you.
This yes commitment for me is about living my life in every possible way. I don’t want to die with shoulda, coulda, woulda’s. I want to experience the world and understand people in a way that only comes with travel. You can only truly relate to people when you’ve walked in their shoes and seen life through their eyes. The world is a vast, crazy place with adventure after adventure waiting for you, calling to you. It’d be a shame to hit ignore.
Travel will challenge you, and it will change you. I come back from every trip refreshed, renewed and a different version of myself; a better, more empathetic, more patient version of myself. So far my yes journey is wonderful. It’s led me to so many new people and experiences that have affected me so deeply- and this trip is no exception. It has also led me to reconnect with old friends and become closer to the people around me.
As I lay in this tent in Tanzania, looking up at the stars, I feel a peace that I haven’t felt maybe ever before. I feel completely confident that I am exactly where I’m meant to be in this moment. I truly believe there are no accidents- the universe is bringing me exactly where I’m meant to be. Every day, I wake up and ask the universe to guide me to my highest path and help me live in accordance with my highest purpose. In saying YES and trusting the little nudges I’m being given, I trust that I’m being led toward my destiny. I don’t know exactly how I got here, or why I’m here- I’m also not sure exactly where I’m going- but I know I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be.
For now, I’m learning to trust the process, have faith in myself and in others and to relinquish some of my precious “control” to go with the flow. I don’t need to know all the hows and whys. I just need to say yes and let go. I need to be present and prepare myself for the journey that lies ahead. I need to live in this completely perfect, very wild moment.